01 May Don’t be a Victim, be a Victor!

When something bad happens to us, it’s natural and normal for others to want to help. And I’m so thankful many people helped out when my hubby fell off his bike and was helicoptered to hospital with internal injuries and broken ribs. He’s okay now and just about ready to go back to work after 5 months off.

So while it’s lovely to have others aid in recovery, there is a point where we need to stop relying on help from others and start to fend for ourselves.

If we begin to be dependent on others for our physical or even emotional needs, than we may be tempted to manipulate them to fulfil our needs. This behaviour can incline us towards controlling tendencies as we attempt to mould others into our ideal version rather than appreciating who the person is.

A better way to live is to not be dependent on others, but interdependent; where it’s give and take. This way we empower ourselves, and we get stronger at whatever we put our mind to. We no longer depend on others filling our need, but have more agency to live a fulfilling and purposeful life.

Empowering ourselves gives us a sense of freedom, control, confidence and a strong sense of our own identity. But don’t take my word for it, try this exercise. Is there something that you’ve always relied on others for? Help with a task? Next time, give yourself some credit, and try working it out or do it by yourself rather than ask a friend to do it for you.

Signs of a victim mentality:

Blaming others

Not taking responsibility

Feeling powerless

Feeling like life has been unfair and

You can’t change anything to help yourself

Bless you this week, Love vetti x