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The Importance of Attachment and Building Security for Young Children

04 October 2024

Integricare, we know how crucial secure attachment is for a child’s emotional and social development. When children feel safe with their caregivers, they are better able to explore the world, build resilience, and form positive relationships.

One helpful model that guides our practice is the learning from the evidence-based program Circle of Security (More info: https://www.circleofsecurityinternational.com/).

This program is backed by decades of research and is a great guide to support educators and parents in understanding their child’s needs for both exploration and comfort.

Here are a few key principles, with practical tips:

  • Be a Safe Haven: Children need to know they can come to you for comfort when they feel unsure or upset. Being there builds trust.
  • Practical Tip: When your child is upset, offer a calm, warm presence. Use phrases like “I’m here for you” or “You’re safe with me” to reassure them. Offer physical comfort, like a hug, and stay close until they feel calm again.
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  • Support Exploration: Let children explore their surroundings, but stay nearby to offer reassurance when needed.
  • Practical Tip: Encourage your child to try new activities or play independently, but be available. Say things like, “I’m right here if you need me” to let them know they can return to you anytime. Acknowledge their achievements when they check in by saying, “You’re doing great!”

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  • Welcome the Return: When children come back for comfort or to share something with you, respond with warmth and openness.
  • Practical Tip: Greet your child’s return with enthusiasm and validation. For example, “I’m so glad you came back to tell me!” or “You must be so proud of what you did!” This reinforces that they can always return for support, no matter what.

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  • Be Bigger, Stronger, Wiser, and Kind: Guide children with calmness and kindness, offering steady support during challenges.
  • Practical Tip: Stay calm when your child is having a tough moment, even during tantrums. Use a low, soothing voice, and offer phrases like “I can help you” or “Let’s figure this out together.” Avoid reacting with frustration; instead, show understanding and set clear, kind boundaries when necessary.

And remember—it’s okay to make mistakes! There is no such thing as a perfect parent, and that’s completely normal. What matters most is that you and your child learn and grow together. Every challenge is an opportunity to strengthen your bond and build security. Be kind to yourself as you navigate the ups and downs of parenting—your child doesn’t need perfection, they need your presence and love.

By fostering secure attachments, we help children develop confidence, independence, and emotional strength—key skills for their future. At Integricare, we’re committed to nurturing these bonds and providing a safe, supportive environment for your child’s growth.

At Integricare Early Learning Centres we are dedicated to creating secure, nurturing environments that foster strong attachments and emotional well-being for all children. If you’d like to learn more about our programs, visit us at Integricare.

Integricare Locations: Find out More about Integricare Childcare Locations

Enrolment Line 1800care1800 (1800 2273 1800).

Enrolment Email: wecare@integricare.org.au.

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References:
• Cooper, G., Hoffman, K., & Powell, B. (2009). Circle of Security: Roadmap to Building Secure Relationships. Circle of Security International.
• Marvin, R. S., Cooper, G., Hoffman, K., & Powell, B. (2002). The Circle of Security project: Attachment-based intervention with caregiver–pre-school child dyads. Attachment & Human Development, 4(1), 107-124.

For more information about the Circle of Security program, visit Circle of Security International.


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